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The Truth About Fruitcakes

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It’s a little known fact that there are only so many fruitcakes in this world; they just get passed around each holiday from hand to hand, family to family, generation to generation. No one is really sure how fruitcakes propagate or their origins. Recently uncovered highly classified documents suggest they are aliens from a distant solar system given sanctuary by the US government in exchange for Zumba and Chia Pet technology. As more and more fruit cakes found their way to Earth, a law was passed restricting the number of new fruitcakes permitted into the country each year, and these are just replacement fruitcakes. (The bill was tied up in Congress for months until they added it as a rider to a bill regulating the classification of raisins: Singing and Non-Singing.) Corsicana, Texas, once a notorious fruitcake internment camp, and now known as the fruitcake capitol of the world, set up factories for the refurbishing and repackaging of recycled fruitcakes. Newly emigrated fruitcakes replace those taken out of service due to age or teeth marks. By the way, the retired fruitcakes are sprayed a dull sand color, shipped to New Mexico and sold to tourists as souvenir genuine Native American handmade adobe bricks. They spend the remainder of their days in peace, as door stops, paper weights and book ends.

 

BJ Neblett is the author of Elysian Dreams, a romantic fantasy adventure available in paperback and e book form. His newest work is an historical memoir about his growing up during the Kennedy administration. Ice Cream Camelot was released earlier this year as an e book to very positive reviews. It will be available in paperback shortly. BJ also hosts two blog sites: www.hereforaseason.blogspot.com for poetry, and www.bjneblett.blogspot.com where he posts his short stories. BJ’s writings have been compared to that of Haruki Murakami and Isaac Asimov.

 

 

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